Florida School District’s Reopening Plan Is Surreal AF

Kids start school again in just a few weeks and things are not looking good. Let’s just say, we’re really glad that we’re not in school anymore…

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Well, My Work Here Is Done

Funny meme that reads, "*Writes the first 3 words of an essay*" above a stock photo of a guy sleeping, with text that reads, "What an exhausting day"

Until tomorrow, when I have to write the entire thing in one day.

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What Is This ‘Happy’ You Speak Of?

Funny tweet about a kid who tells his teacher that he wants to be happy when he grows up; teacher says to parents, "We need to talk about your son's unrealistic expectations"

Happiness isn’t real.

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HI! PLEASE WHITELIST US WITH YOUR ADBLOCKER! YOUR SUPPORT MEANS A LOT TO US! THANK YOU!!

HI! PLEASE WHITELIST US WITH YOUR ADBLOCKER! YOUR SUPPORT MEANS A LOT TO US! THANK YOU!!

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Entitled Student Steals Designs, Gets Humiliated

This entitled and lazy student’s antics finally caught up with her. The revenge as it unfolded, could not have gone any better. Through a little coordination the classmate of “lazy student” and the teacher were able to set up a presentation, where lazy student was exposed for stealing multiple companies’ work. She gets a proper calling out in front of everyone, and hopefully absorbed the reality check for what it was. Do your own work! 

This entitled and lazy student’s antics finally caught up with her. The revenge as it unfolded, could not have gone any better. Through a little coordination the classmate of “lazy student” and the teacher were able to set up a presentation, where lazy student was exposed for stealing multiple companies’ work. She gets a proper calling out in front of everyone, and hopefully absorbed the reality check for what it was. Do your own work! 

1.

Text - r/ProRevenge u/sgy0003 · 22h + Join 2 1 W 2 3 3 1 Steal my design and get all the credits? Enjoy getting kicked off So my friend over in Korea studies fashion design. She sometimes sends me over the sketches of the designs, and they all look amazing. (Then again, l'm not into fashion.) She is particularly interested in designing handbags and purses. She told me a story about how she shut down one of the most entitled, self-centered, lazy students on campus. Cast: Grace: Our main character

2.

Text - Professor: The instructor of the course Story: At first, Grace and Jane got along just fine. They were both interested in similar stuff, and quickly became bffs. Grace decided to show Jane her sketches and designs for handbags and purses, and Jane was so impressed by it. Because the sketches were in incredible detail, including all the patterns and sew lines, coupled with figurative measurements. Even Professor was impressed by it, and it was no surprise that Grace got a high mark on thei

3.

Text - turned out to be one of the most entitled, lazy, and selfish people that Grace has ever met. Things that JAne did to piss Grace off included, but not limited to: • Not paying attention Being late on their study session Never showed appreciation Didn't pay for coffee or snack Complaining annoyingly about how hard it was to draw something Grace pretty much gave up on her after a week, refusing to meet Jane outside of her class. Time went by and for their mid-term, everyone in the class had

4.

Text - stolen one of her designs. Thankfully Grace had multiple designs going on so there were no conflicts when it was her turn to present, but she was seething with rage. Grace had a meeting with the professor afterwards, and the professor knew what was going on, but couldn't really do anything with Jane because it turns out she was the daughter of the chairman (or one of the major investors, Grace said she can't recall). The chairman apparently blackmailed the professor into giving Jane the b

5.

Text - So you know how Grace had a bunch of sketches for the class? Well, Grace also had a separate sketchbook that had designs from major brands. MK, Coach, you name it. She never used these directly for class assignments, but rather as inspirations for her designs. Grace pretended to be all friendly with Jane again, and brought the other sketchbook on their meetings, still putting up with all the problems mentioned above. Grace secretly worked tirelessly on her new design, and did her best to

6.

Text - praise from the judges. After a few more presentations, the last one to go was Jane. Jane's presentation turned out to be another copycat, copying designs of not one, not two, but three different companies. After the presentation, this was how it went all down (at least according to Grace): Judge 1: So you are saying you designed all these by yourself, right? Jane: That's right Judge 1: And you swear that it really was your design, and didn't copy off from anything else, right?

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Text - Jane: I swear Judge 1: ..You are aware your designs are from (three brands)? .... Jane: huh? Judge 1: Are you aware that these are on market right now, and some of the most popular designs? Jane: Wait, hold on-

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Text - Judge 2: Yeah, I was going to bring this up. If you had worked for any brands, you would have probably been fired or worse case, sued Jane: But- Judge 2: Please, I am not done yet; Did you honestly think this would work? We (the judges) have been in the industry for over 10 years. We know a copycat when we see it. Jane: But these aren't even my designs! They are from Grace! Judge 3: (To Grace) is this true?

9.

Text - Grace: Yes, but l'd never use them for major projects nor call them my work; I just use sketches of them as inspirations for my own designs Judge 3: Well, that was clear from your presentation (Turning back to Jane) Now, Ms. Jane, this is a clear case of plagiarism, and I do hope your school is merciful on this matter. After the presentation was over, the chairman screamed at the professor in front of everyone, not realizing he just revealed all the blackmailing and the secret grade deal.

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Irritating Times Students Encountered Toxic Nonsense

This Twitter thread serves as a collection of times that students encountered challenges, adversity, from teachers or classmates. If anything, it can serve as a valuable reminder to stay true to yourself, and not let any of the haters get ya down. There will always be someone around ready to crack the next joke or laugh at your expense. Who cares? 

This Twitter thread serves as a collection of times that students encountered challenges, adversity, from teachers or classmates. If anything, it can serve as a valuable reminder to stay true to yourself, and not let any of the haters get ya down. There will always be someone around ready to crack the next joke or laugh at your expense. Who cares? 

1.

Text - Justin Boldaji @justinboldaji I became radicalized when I was in 4th grade & I took a science test & studied hard for it & ended up completely acing it but when I was done with the test I was bored & drew monsters in the margins of the paper & my teacher gave me a 90 out of 100 because of the monsters

2.

Text - bloop. @hibanako Replying to @justinboldaji i had a 7th grade english teach who told me to turn in an assignment i had already turned in and i told her and she literally yelled at me that i didnt and told me if i did to find it then and it was like the 10th one

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Text - (goth) Kassa @kassaotaku Replying to @justinboldaji My Spanish teacher in 10th grade, made us do 12 questions of a test in a 1-20 question Scantron then made us do the other part of the test on another Scantron but starting at 13, then made us do another 15Q in a bigger one, Then take everything and put it in a single Scantron

4.

Text - ダークソール @DarkSoul4242 Replying to @justinboldaji (English as a second language) I got once sent to the principal's office for talking back when my English teacher said "I am been" or "I will can" pointed out it was "I have been" and "be able to", she got hysteric and straight-up gave me Os for the whole year, dividing my grades

5.

Text - Sparrow/Liz : liminal nest @UntoNuggan Replying to @justinboldaji Context: My mom is from the UK, my dad from the US, I grew up in the US with children's books from both countries In kindergarten I kept getting marked wrong for writing "colour" and I was so upset, especially because I didn't realize there were US/UK spelling differences

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Text - rae bae @epicgringa Replying to @justinboldaji sophomore year in HS i had to write a ~persuasive essay and i didnt use the cookie cutter outline bullshit everyone used to write the paper and my teacher used my essay as an example to the class on what not to do.

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Text - Satan's Craft Room @CraftSatan Replying to @justinboldaji My HS vice principal interrupted my history class to share his personal story of going to UC Berkeley and being a Navy Seal. I cont to read the text. He pushed the book to the ground. Few years later he was on the news for faking credentials and lying about being in the military.

8.

Text - hrwinter @hrwinter Replying to @justinboldaji A professor gave me a failing 66 for a midterm. There were no red marks. When I went to his office hours to ask, he said it was because I only used answers from the book and not statements from his (incorrect) lectures. I'd somehow failed by not quoting him directly.

9.

Text - My Dog Eats Sticks @chetsbabe Replying to @ubersle and @justinboldaji I had an English teacher in 10th grade yell at me in class on our first research paper saying, "You can't write one sentence paragraphs." I now get paid to do so. Suck it Mr. Kidwell.

10.

Text - * marissa * @mxrivel Replying to @joshcurwin and @justinboldaji elementary school teachers are so annoying- they're teaching you basic things like writing but they will not let you do anything slightly different from what they do :/ when i was younger i wrote left handed but the teacher told me that was wrong and now i'm right handed

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Text - Karlie Marks @KarlieMarks Replying to @justinboldaji and @_aurely my senior thesis had a point knocked off for using the word "wed" instead of "married" even though wed fit the sentence structure better than married. also teach said she "didn't believe in perfect papers" and was really just looking for a place to dock my grade.

12.

Text - Leah @ubersle Replying to @justinboldaji In 4th grade, I answered the quiz question, "What do you call an animal that eats only plants?" as herbivore. My teacher marked it wrong and said it was 'vegetarian. I'd have taken that to the Supreme Court such was my wrath.

13.

Text - "Shine bright, circus man' @ChancellorSRA Replying to @ubersle and @justinboldaji I had a similar thing in 4th grade. Question: what do a plant's roots do? 9 yo Me: suck up water and nutrients Teacher: WRONG. They hold the plant in the ground. My mom, looking at the test answers: I... think your teacher might hate you.

14.

Text - Gillian Smith is LOCKED IN @thishere_nomad Replying to @justinboldaji My 4th grade science teacher had us make sun-cookers and my scientist parents looked at the directions and tossed them out the window for being wrong. My sun-cooker was one of two that actually worked and both of us got D's for not following directions.

15.

Text - Josh @joshcurwin Replying to @justinboldaji In second grade I took a math test, and instead of the normal 7, I wrote the kind that has the small horizontal line intersecting the vertical, cause l'd seen it in a book and liked it. The teacher marked each answer with such a 7 as wrong. 1.

16.

Text - JOI Biden 3030 @imacopyouidiot9 Replying to @justinboldaji My 1st grade teacher was teaching us math and I solved all the problems in the workbook when she was talking. She told me that "it was homework" and made me erase all my answers.

17.

Text - Mike Provencher @RevilFox Replying to @justinboldaji My 6th grade Home Room teacher had a deal where if you do all of your homework for 14 straight days, for every class, and get it signed off by every teacher, she would buy you McDonald's for lunch. I did it, and when I showed her she said, "Yeah, this deal isn't for you."

18.

Text - Brooke Zoom School of Law class of 2020 @Yarsian Replying to @justinboldaji I went to school where some teachers checked our notebooks. Like if we didn't have the notes exactly how they wanted them it would hurt your grade. Doodles were right out. So was understanding things differently. They also controlled what color folder went with what class.

19.

Text - an anthropomorphic guillotine, hungry and waiting @Queen_Antifa Replying to @justinboldaji I knew how negative numbers worked in first grade, and instead of writing 0 when we subtracted a large number from a smaller one, I wrote the correct answer. The teacher marked these as wrong and told me not to get ahead of first grade.

20.

Text - RogerStonePrisonbound! @TamarSmith3 Replying to @Damaia and @justinboldaji In 4th grade read Agatha Christie books under the table. My teacher would punish me for it. I was nine years old and reading adult books! Years later I thought how limited my teacher was for not recognizing what an advanced reader I was and encouraging it.

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19 Tweets That Prove Kids On Zoom Are Hilarious

It’s difficult to count the ways that the pandemic has uprooted our lives. Many of us are jobless. People have lost loved ones. We’re all getting cabin fever from being cooped up in our homes. But kids have got it pretty weird. And so do parents. As their studies move to the internet, children are being forced to endure “Zoom classes.” And while that seems pretty surreal and scary for many of us, kids happen to be super adaptable. And that adaptability can often translate to humor. These tweets, which come from parents eavesdropping on their children’s virtual lessons, are some seriously wholesome proof of that. 

1.

Text - Lin-Manuel Miranda @Lin_Manuel Kindergarten Zoom Dance Teacher: Yes, Sebastian, you have a question? Sebastian (unmuting himself): Yes, my little brother really likes dancing. Teacher: That's great! Sebastian: So can he do this class for me? cc: @VAMNI. 10:20 AM · 5/22/20 · Twitter Web App

2.

Text - Arnie Niekamp @misterarnie Overheard my daughter, doing a Zoom meeting with her kindergarten class, saying, with the weariness of an adult, "Clark, you're muted." 5:53 PM · 4/13/20 · Twitter Web App

3.

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Text - k.liz @kathyyliz 'when i got money from the tooth fairy because my tooth came out, i decided i want to collect more money.' - a kindergartener in this Zoom class. i am ROLLING. the HUSTLE 10:48 AM · 5/21/20 · Twitter for iPhone

5.

Text - Imacleod @lmacleod Overheard on kindergarten zoom... Teacher: "What's 14+1?" Child: "I don't have enough fingers for that!" 8:42 AM - 5/8/20 · Twitter for iPhone

6.

Text - suesalvi @suesalvi Just overheard on my 9-year-old's Zoom: "Would Santa kill a shark?" ...really got me thinking. 12:29 PM · 5/22/20 · Twitter Web App

7.

Hamster - Kelly Huh, Ph.D. @glaciergeek I overheard zoom kids chat the other day that if all students can wear hamster balls at schools, then it may be good to return. GIF 7:42 PM · 5/16/20 · Twitter for iPhone

8.

Text - Andrew Exum @ExumAM I just overheard my five-year old tell a girl in his preschool class, on Zoom, "Hey [Name],I dreamed of you last night." What a little Casanova. 9:56 AM · 4/7/20 · Twitter for iPhone

9.

Text - Monica Mahoney O @mmPharmD Well ... I was just shared during Kindergarten zoom show and tell "THIS IS MY MOMMY!" 2:34 PM · 5/11/20 · Twitter for Android

10.

Text - Karl Brophy O @KarlBrophy Overheard from the teacher on the 8 year-old's Zoom spelling test this week: "Okay class, let's not use virtual backgrounds. We don't want people being distracted." 6:35 AM · 5/1/20 · Twitter for iPad

11.

Text - Ryan Dilbert O @ryandilbert Overheard in my daughter's Zoom class: Go ahead and put your lizard away and we'll get started on our math. 11:43 AM · 4/28/20 from Houston, TX · Twitter for iPhone

12.

Text - Ranak Trivedi @RanakTrivedi Overheard on my 5 yo daughter's classroom zoom: "I have a comment and a question" #futureacademic #preparingforconferences cc: @vibhor_chhabra 12:12 PM · 5/18/20 · Twitter for iPhone

13.

Text - David Enrich O @davidenrich Every Monday, my son's kindergarten class shares (via Zoom) what everyone did this weekend. Today I heard: "socially distanced picnic" "walked in the woods but it was too crowded" "wore masks" "stayed home" They're saying these phrases like they're normal. 9:33 AM - 5/18/20 · Twitter Web App

14.

Text - Todd Coleman @todd_coleman My daughter had a Zoom class yesterday. The teacher's internet went out, so one of the kids was made the default host. He muted everyone, pretended to teach the class, and then just said "fart" over and over until the teacher was able to join back. It was amazing. 10:12 AM · 4/29/20 · Twitter Web App

15.

Text - Mike Lobikis @MLfromdeep When my daughter joins her zoom class in the morning, every kid just yells "poopy" at the other kids for 5 minutes.

16.

Text - LazyManAndMoney @LazyManAndMoney My 7-year old's Zoom class right now... Teacher: Who wants to add a character to the story? Girl: l'd like to add a bird. My son: l'd like to add a ginormous cucumber zombie. Next kid: l'd like to add a rabbit. 9:38 AM · 5/21/20 · TweetDeck

17.

Text - Kiel Phegley @KielPhegley You Know, For Kids Just listened to a kid on my child's preschool class zoom call tel everyone "This is Link, the character from Zelda: Toilet Princess." 11:23 AM - 5/22/20 · Twitter Web App

18.

Text - Jason Isbell @Jasonlsbel| My favorite moment from quarantine has been my four year old daughter explaining fuzz tone guitar to her zoom preschool class 11:46 AM · 5/19/20 · Twitter for iPhone

19.

Text - a breast of fresh air @joinez My dumb ass logged my son into his Zoom class and I ain't have no shirt on Lmaoo all I heard was 15 Lil ass voices saying ewwwww 9:06 AM · 5/19/20 · Twitter for iPhone

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Twitter Thread About Elementary School Brings Back Memories

If you grew up in the ’90s then scrolling through this Twitter thread will give you a serious case of nostalgia. Twitter user Melina threw together a hodgepodge of images of things we had completely forgotten about from our schooling days and let’s just say, they took us on a little trip down memory lane.

1.

Text - melina i @melmadara bringing back weird memories from elementary school: A THREAD 9:55 am · 3/3/20 · Twitter for iPhone 102K Retweets 541K Likes

2.

Text - melina i @melmadara why was this so thrilling to use untitled Paint File Edit View Image Colors Help For Help, click Help Topics on the Help Menu.

3.

Geology - melina @melmadara these smelled SO bad and were probably washed once a year

4.

Vehicle door - melina @melmadara resting your head on the cold window just hit different

5.

Musical instrument - melina @melmadara why were we forced to play hot cross buns

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Bead - melina @melmadara when this would hit your ankles .. ow

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Text - melina @melmadara now THIS is anxiety Name Date x 2 9. x 9 7 x 3 9 4 9 x 9 x 9 x 8 9. 8 9 9 9 x 5 x 9 x 4 6 x 9 1 x 9 3 x 9 9 2 9 5 x 7 x 9 x 6 x 9 9 9 9 9 9 x 1 x 3 x 6 x 1 x 0 x 2 1 8 x 9 5 2 х 9 9 x 9 x 9 X 8 X 5 4 9 x 9 x 9 x 9 x 7 x 9 3 x 9 9 7 9 9 8 x 4 x 9 x 8 x 9 x 9 5 9. 7 x 9 X 9 x 5 x 1 x 4 x 9 weri 4N peoblems wng corect 9.

8.

Colorfulness - melina @melmadara what.. what were these for why are they so familiar

9.

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10.

Cookware and bakeware - melina @melmadara the flavor of the wooden spoon haunts me to this day CEDAR CREST VAN +

11.

Product - melina @melmadara these!!! i can still smell them GENTED WATER COLOR MARKERS WATER MARKENS VSANFORO MR.SMETCH SCENTED WATER COLOR MARKERS SCENTED SCENTED

12.

Furniture - coming back to see your finished product ... best feeling

13.

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14.

Pen - melina @melmadara if you had these you were COOL

15.

Chair - melina @melmadara the static that came from these ...

16.

Text - melina @melmadara the flavor late Chocolate Choce 02 SELL BY J 02 SELL Y olate Chocolate Chocolate Chocolate Chocola VITAMNAD SELL PY A a SELL BY JA 02 SELL BY Chocola Icolate Chocolate Fat Free Chocolate VITAIN ARD Chocolate VITAMNAND SChoc ChocolateChocolate Checolate Chocolate Chocola MILK MILK MILK MILK MIEK MILK MILK MILK

17.

Product - melina @melmadara scholastic. book. fair. MAD REA MAD STIC 10:12 am · 4/3/20 · Twitter for iPhone 3,360 Retweets 40.3K Likes

18.

Product - melina @melmadara pencil grips !!!

19.

Text - melina ". @melmadara and let's not forget

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Fifteen Salty People Talk About The Times They Got Effed Over In School

Everyone has an experience they’ll never get over from their schooling years. Maybe you got punished once for something you didn’t do, or maybe it was that time that your first grade teacher yelled at you in front of the class for getting a math question wrong (looking at you, Ms. Anderson). The following people took to Twitter to reveal the things they’re still pissed off about, and we can’t say we blame them.

Everyone has an experience they’ll never get over from their schooling years. Maybe you got punished once for something you didn’t do, or maybe it was that time that your first grade teacher yelled at you in front of the class for getting a math question wrong (looking at you, Ms. Anderson). The following people took to Twitter to reveal the things they’re still pissed off about, and we can’t say we blame them.

1.

Text - Justin Boldaji u @justinboldaji I became radicalized when I was in 4th grade & I took a science test & studied hard for it & ended up completely acing it but when I was done with the test I was bored & drew monsters in the margins of the paper & my teacher gave me a 90 out of 100 because of the monsters

2.

Text - Karlie Marks @KarlieMarks · 9h my senior thesis had a point knocked off for using the word "wed" instead of "married" even though wed fit the sentence structure better than married. also teach said she "didn't believe in perfect papers" and was really just looking for a place to dock my grade. 27 8 534 O BISEXUAL BITCH| @_aurely · 9h NTIAU My history teacher would often take points away from me for having a "correct answer but not the one I'm looking for" 360

3.

Text - Choo Choo, Motherfucker @valiscariot · 6h At some point in grade school I failed a math test because I answered questions that went negative correctly instead of writing "no answer" because the class hadn't been taught that yet. Pretty sure I haven't tried since then 43 Choo Choo, Motherfucker @valiscariot · 5h I should add I had no way of knowing the class hadn't been taught that; I had just gotten back from Disneyworld 26

4.

Text - @guttermice My 5th grade teacher used to bully me in front of the whole class and would make me cry and tell me to get thicker skin. I requested to get transferred from her class and she said ok go to another class so I grabbed my stuff and she laughed and said jk I hope she gets coughed on 15:56 · 09 May 20 · Twitter for iPhone

5.

Text - Don't Call Me Lady @cornmaes Replying to @justinboldaji 4th grade teacher called me to the front of the class to tell me that no one was going to want to marry me because I was so annoying. I was being bullied hard- core and she didn't believe me when I told her so she tried to convince my mom I had schizophrenia and was hearing shit

6.

Text - Leah @ubersle In 4th grade, I answered the quiz question, "What do you call an animal that eats only plants?" as herbivore. My teacher marked it wrong and said it was 'vegetarian.' I'd have taken that to the Supreme Court such was my wrath. 18:11 · 09 May 20 · Twitter for iPhone

7.

Text - pj * @noloveformylove in 3rd grade i got a 100% on a test but i forgot to put my name on it. it was my first time forgetting my name but i was the only one who forgot to put my name so she knew it was mine, but she wanted to 'make an example' of me so she ripped it up in front of everyone. i got an F. 20:50 · 09 May 20 · Twitter for iPhone

8.

Text - wicker the baby tree @InkstoneWicker oh also i was forced to sit outside the classroom in the hall because i was reading better than my peers and, apparently, making them feel bad. i was singled out and isolated because i liked to read as a hobby. they made me a spectacle. i got so bullied, i had to switch schools. 19:02 · 09 May 20 Twitter for Android 1 Retweet 22 Likes

9.

Text - Chaos Goblin @AvroArlo When my brother was in the first grade, they were told they had 60 seconds to get outside during a fire drill. When another student asked how long that was, my brother said "it's a minute". Cue my parents getting called to the school over "teaching him outside of class" 18:01 · 09 May 20 · Twitter Web App

10.

Text - HTTPaladin @HTTPaladin · 5h Chamon My second grade teacher kept a desk in the back that only had a puzzle that only I worked on that I was able to use whenever I finished my work early. In the third gradeI got told to stay in my seat, bored, until everyone else finished. Rage. 27 37 Christina Winds @ChristinaWinds · 2h I credit teachers like this for becoming a writer. I would read after I finished my work - except shitty teachers would take away my books bcuz I should be 'focusing on cla

11.

Text - Mike Provencher @RevilFox 1h Replying to @justinboldaji My 6th grade Home Room teacher had a deal where if you do all of your homework for 14 straight days, for every class, and get it signed off by every teacher, she would buy you McDonald's for lunch. I did it, and when I showed her she said, "Yeah, this deal isn't for you." 4 27 kris @thegirlkris · 47m Wow I hope she fucking chokes O 3

12.

Text - quarantined fka O, fka @coopercooperco I once went to the principal's office in like first or second grade for “holding a pretzel stick in my mouth like a cigarette." They made me call my parents. 14:19 · 09 May 20 · Twitter for iPhone 107 Likes

13.

Text - Just Your Local Anime Guy @Mendinso Replying to @justinboldaji and @YorPalSal I got a 3 hour detention because a kid harassed me in classroom, screamed at him in response, teacher walked in, had us both go to the office. Kid got jack shit. I got a detention for "disrupting the class". Teacher even bought the kid's excuse for wanting to show "his snake".

14.

Text - Meredith Schwartz @Kalendaries · 8h When I was in 8th grade my social studies teacher told us to write a two page paper on a Russian historical figure as if it were an autobiography. I got Tolstoy. I read War and Peace in a weekend and turned in a 21 page paper in my best pastiche of Tolstoy's style.. 2 27 3 100 Meredith Schwartz @Kalendaries· 8h ..and got a grade taken off because I left the ragged edges on my notebook paper 27 3 155 Kaila @Kaila20250315 · 4h Give me your teacher's numbe

15.

Text - Cough On Kelly Loeffler @sydneymsteingm1 This makes me think of my 8th grade English teacher who would NEVER give a 100 on essays because she “didn't believe in the perfect paper". She gave me a 95 once bc the words weren't close enough to the margin 17:05 · 09 May 20 · Twitter for iPhone

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Eighth Grader Would Have Cranked Classroom Pencil Sharpener Few More Times If She Knew That Going To Be Last Chance

DENVER—Reflecting on the simple pleasure that she would likely never experience again, area eighth-grader Francesca Jaffe told reporters Tuesday that she would have cranked the classroom pencil sharpener a few more times had she known it was going to be the last chance she’d get. “Man, if you’d have told me in March…

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DENVER—Reflecting on the simple pleasure that she would likely never experience again, area eighth-grader Francesca Jaffe told reporters Tuesday that she would have cranked the classroom pencil sharpener a few more times had she known it was going to be the last chance she’d get. “Man, if you’d have told me in March…

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Texts from Students Who Had to Take Care of Electronic Babies

Depending on where you went to school and what classes you took, you may have had a project where you had to take care of a sack of flour as if it were a child, or in this case, a robotic doll programmed to cry. Based on how frustrating these things can be, we’re not sure if these projects were designed to be a learning experience so much as birth control. It doesn’t take simulated parenting to know that kids are weird and dumb, and that toddlers have meltdowns over nothing, but having a robot baby wake up in the middle of the night might be a literal wake-up call for a high school freshman.

Depending on where you went to school and what classes you took, you may have had a project where you had to take care of a sack of flour as if it were a child, or in this case, a robotic doll programmed to cry. Based on how frustrating these things can be, we’re not sure if these projects were designed to be a learning experience so much as birth control. It doesn’t take simulated parenting to know that kids are weird and dumb, and that toddlers have meltdowns over nothing, but having a robot baby wake up in the middle of the night might be a literal wake-up call for a high school freshman.

1.

Text - Can you shut off my baby Today 6:14 AM Hello miss lefebvre can you please shut of the child Today 7:48 AM Good morning, I can't shut off or control your baby. It is scheduled for the times you picked when it was programmed. I can't control it. If you or tired or frustrated, ask someone to help you. If you absolutely cannot do it anymore there is an emergency shut off that would end the baby completely and would stop the process totally. If you want to do this, let me know.

2.

Text - iMessage Today 11:09 AM are the i'd bracelets water proof ? Yes Read 11:18 AM okay thank you

3.

Text - Today 8:32 AM Can I put the child in my bag? No So I have to carry it in the cole Cold Yep wrap it up in blanket in carrier Ok

4.

Text - Yesterday 1:30 PM Hey, it's make noise to touch the baby or should I be constantly holding it? . Do I wait for it to Sorry nvm Is it good? Yeah sorry, I didnt have to text you That's ok! Okay thanks Yesterday 6:40 PM Is it working? Yeah, but I've been rocking him for like 20 min and he still is whining Lol That's normal? Nvm he's sleeping

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Text - Yesterday 9:08 PM Hi it's time because he won't stop wimpier and l've tried everything and it's been going on for an hour I really need a quiet We can't add quiet time after being programmed. Get someone to help you. You have a spare bracelet to let someone help. Do I sill have to take care of him until Sunday or can he be turned off on Saturday It's on for whatever you picked in class today

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Text - Yesterday 6:28 PM So Lucy and I might of fallen down the stairs....0opsies Oops. Did she die? Delivered Not that l'm aware of yet Just praying she makes a noise Soon Today 6:55 AM So good and bad news lucky definitely isn't dead

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Text - Today 8:58 AM I dont remeber of it was 7 am that it times out at or 7pm It would be in the evening. It's possible it may sleep most of the day. No way to know. As you sent that text it started crying

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AskReddit Thread: False Things That School Taught Us

Someone on AskReddit got a fun and enlightening thread going about the various things that school taught us, that we later learned were false. Better to learn that those tidbits of “knowledge” were false, late than never at all. 

Check out another recent AskReddit thread that we ran, which focused on the most awkward questions students asked in sex ed.

Someone on AskReddit got a fun and enlightening thread going about the various things that school taught us, that we later learned were false. Better to learn that those tidbits of “knowledge” were false, late than never at all. 

Check out another recent AskReddit thread that we ran, which focused on the most awkward questions students asked in sex ed.

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Text - PM_Me_Nudes_2_Review • 19h That we had a "permanent record"

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Text - michaeltheantisocial • 20h College professors would be more strict

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Text - ABronawithCorona • 19h The body cannot produce new nerve/brain cells. Turns out neurogenesis is a very real phenomenon. Btw: I was taught that the body cannot make new nervous cells this year in my senior Human Anatomy class, long after neurogenesis was discovered.

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Text - qwatschel69 • 19h You will need this for the rest of your life

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Text - "These are the best years of your life"

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Text - Notmykl • 19h Hawai'ians wanted to be a territory so they could join the US and become a state and were overjoyed when they achieved statehood.

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Text - jonahvsthewhale • 19h That grades in elementary and middle school actually matter. I had a 45 in my 5th grade history class at one point, and I LOVED history. I just didn't like having to memorize the preamble to the constitution and other pointless things my school made us do. I now read and study history on my own and know far more history than the average person

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White - Rustyy60 • 19h Teachers aren't biased

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Text - HumanoidRobot • 20h You can rely on authority figures to resolve your interpersonal conflicts.

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Text - AskAboutMyCoffee • 20h That I can be whatever I want when I grow up :( I'm still not a fire truck.

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Text - JaWiCa • 19h There are more people alive on earth than have ever died.

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Text - frequentstreaker • 19h You won't get anywhere in life without learning how to write in cursive

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Text - Cahpoewn • 20h That blood is actually blue

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Text - TurkeyBLTSandwich • 19h Two things: 1. Keep these papers they're important don't lose them (I ended up hoarding papers all the way from 1st grade to senior year of high school) 2. If you ever get a C or into a fight or cheat you'll never go to College and you'll be blacklisted from applying or attending any of them. I didnt really think of the impact these things had on me and suffice to say I feel like I'm worse off for it.

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Text - llcucf80 • 19h Nutrition. When I started elementary school it was the four food groups, by high school it was the food pyramid, and by college it turned into myplate. You can't ever keep up and it constantly changed, so who knows what'll turn into next.

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Text - hypo-osmotic • 19h The provinces and territories of Canada (I'm in the United States). We had to memorize them in middle school in the mid-00's, but our teacher didn't update any political border changes that happened after the fall of the Soviet Union, so I didn't know Nunavut exists until I happened to look at a map of Canada as an adult

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Text - TKinfinity • 16h "You will be using Cursive writing more than printing when your older' The only thing I use it for is my Signature. Other than that it's useless.

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Twitter Thread: English Teacher Meets Foreign Student With Understanding

This wholesome Twitter thread from @AskAKorean, includes a story about their experience with taking a quiz in an American classroom shortly after immigrating. Naturally, the quiz was confusing in the whole new language presented. But, the teacher met the student’s confusion with kindness and understanding. That understanding ultimately propelled the student forward with excitement and passion. A little push can go a long way. 

This wholesome Twitter thread from @AskAKorean, includes a story about their experience with taking a quiz in an American classroom shortly after immigrating. Naturally, the quiz was confusing in the whole new language presented. But, the teacher met the student’s confusion with kindness and understanding. That understanding ultimately propelled the student forward with excitement and passion. A little push can go a long way. 

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Text - T.K. of AAK! @AskAKorean · 2d Remember: nearly all Americans came from somewhere else. More ITS SPRING! Americans are coming from abroad as we speak. So if you're born and raised in America, I hope you would be kind and patient with the new arrivals. I hope you would be the Ms. Gallagher to someone else. /end

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Fifteen Grammar Memes For Pompous Intellectuals

A good, solid knowledge of grammar is important for anyone who wants to get their point across in an intelligent manner. But we all know those grammar snobs who just love to use the good old ad hominem fallacy – that is, attacking a grammatical mistake that is completely irrelevant to the argument at hand. 

Click here if you’re in the mood to feel even more irritated with the English language!

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Cartoon - The boys and I learning proper usage of pronouns in school.

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Text - Hank Smith @hankrsmith I'm giving up sweets for the entire month. Hank Smith @hankrsmith Oh sorry, I forgot the period. I'm giving up. Sweets for the entire month.

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Text - Do you like anyone? yeah, you Um, I have a bf yeah, you?* Delivered Ohh haha RESTORATION 100

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Font - Ано How does the the human brain ignore the second "the"?

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Text - habibs @thebabainarabic The language proficiency level: making native speaker mistakes on purpose and feeling no shame bout it

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Facial expression - Teacher : can you tell me two pronouns? Me : Who? Me? Teacher : correct! Very good.

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Text - ( Messages (1) Mother Details Your failing English You're Imay be an idiot...but im not stupid.

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Blackboard - When you upload a meme with the correct spelling and punctuation: mri mirpi GMm L-mrp- const EIntelligence dt= MIE-GMan , conet - const de- GMa 2mp GMm Feamet Ikn zmr 2-1

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Font - Your welcome mat. Thank you. oda MATT WELCOME You're welcome, Matt. MATT W ELCOME @button

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Face - Types of Headaches Migraine Hypertension irregular verbs Stress

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Food - Here's my first attempt at synonym rolls @BrazilFlair Just like grammar used to make

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Cartoon - Auto correct when it sees a misspelt word: Auto correct when is sees a perfectly spelt word

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Organism - e github io/brains I can't cannot I can't can I am unable to can I am unable to able to can

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Cartoon - Norse German oll English Latin French What the hell is this? Greek

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Cartoon - KILLER BROS CO. Affect Effect

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Quick Tumblr Thread Appreciates Different Perspectives

This brief and wholesome Tumblr thread takes a moment to appreciate the different perspectives of human beings that are deaf or blind. It’s quite endearing. Especially that hilarious moment that the professor realized the student could see, and might want the light on for a test. 

This brief and wholesome Tumblr thread takes a moment to appreciate the different perspectives of human beings that are deaf or blind. It’s quite endearing. Especially that hilarious moment that the professor realized the student could see, and might want the light on for a test. 

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AskReddit Thread: Funniest Things People Saw At School

People are describing the most absurd and hilarious things that they witnessed while at school. Many of us might be able to recall those times that absolute ridiculous chaos broke out in the classroom. Kids get bored enough and they’re bound to do some silly stuff. 

People are describing the most absurd and hilarious things that they witnessed while at school. Many of us might be able to recall those times that absolute ridiculous chaos broke out in the classroom. Kids get bored enough and they’re bound to do some silly stuff. 

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Text - lil_zagawy 18h A kid in my class tried throwing a glue stick up in the air and swiping at it to catch it but instead launched it and it hit the teacher

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Text - Mister_Khim • 19h In middle school I saw a girl run into a pole cause she wasn't looking. She screamed then kicked the pole and screamed again. 10/10

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Text - Legend_of_Utopia • 17h Our gym teacher telling us how to dribble and shoot and she missed every shot she took and double dribbled every time

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Text - sniffleprickles • 18h 1 Award A couple guys I went to high school with came in one day wearing spider Man and venom costumes under their clothes. During lunch they shed their regular clothes and fought.

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Text - Princessm3m3s • 18h When I was in third grade, the principal said that we are gonna host a crown party because of a recent event. So In the next 2 days we were all dressed royal n stuff but then you see the class next to me they misheard crown for clown and LEMME TELL YOU. These kids looked so funny. I kinda felt bad because they might've been embarrassed. But hey, what else can I do?

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Text - Acidic_White_Girl • 18h Once, in fifth grade, we had a lockdown drilI, and this kid hopped up onto the lockers. Above the lockers, there were windows that looked into the classroom. He looked through, and in a really strange voice, yelled "I seeeee youuu".

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Text - Kastillex • 18h A teacher (M around 35) walked into a class dressed up as Marge Simpson for Halloween.

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Text - Soullessly_Wandering • 19h I mean... someone went to the breakfast line from the exit, took a piece of bread then booked it out of the cafeteria with 2 security people following them.

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Text - Habfier25 • 15h My friend asked to go to the bathroom, and the teacher responded with "I don't know, can you?" And he said, "I don't know, can you settle the divorce your in?" (By the way, he couldn't settle it)

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Text - th3_warth0g • 18h It was my senior year of football. Before practice, some players were on specialty teams meanwhile the linemen were bored on the side line. We had this one lineman/backer who transferred from one of our rival schools and was arrogant af. He wasn't that bad but he really pissed some of us off. He was called over to the specialty teams practice. My buddy wanted to practice his punt because we had nothing better to do. He picked up a ball, dropped with ease and a strong ass

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Text - idklilb • 15h Freshman year, there was a vegetarian kid who sat at my lunch table. One day for lunch, he wanted to eat but just wanted his lunch without the meat (which they could've easily done for him). The lunch lady refused to do it, so he jumped over the counter, got it himself, jumped back over and slammed his money down by the register before walking out of the cafeteria.

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Text - fell-deeds-awake • 17h Freshman year, (honors) world history. Watching some documentary about Napoleon, one of those that has reenactment scenes included. Guy asked the teacher, with a totally straight face, if it was actual footage.

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Text - swagerito • 18h In high school some students had made a meme account that was just about the school, making fun of teachers etc. so one day it was gonna snow real hard and the school didnt want to let us go home before it was gonna snow so one of the students announced on the meme page we were gonna protest that and like 200 people ended up throwing moshpits in the small ass halway next to the principles office, and it worked! best day of my life.

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Text - Incognonymous212 • 15h first day of the new school year couple of years ago we walk into our social studies class and saw our new teacher. she was probs in her mid twenties, incredibly hot, hands down hottest teacher in my schools history. she introduces herself, and then leaves to go to the bathroom. as she is walking out the door, one kid, who didn't see that she wasn't out of earshot, yelled: "SHES SO HOT OH MY GOD!"

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Text - CatoTheWeen19 • 16h I think about this often... Freshman year of high school we had a substitute teacher for math who was super old. He was everyone's favorite because he would fall asleep more often than not. The class clown, Jezreel, was in my class, first hour algebra I. He decided it was the perfect time to start jumping on top of the desks and hissing at everyone. He then proceeded to dive out the open window from the desk and got stuck but managed an escape. What a memory.

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Text - godthe4th • 15h Year 6, my friend didn't want his pizza and wanted to throw it out, than another friend tells him not to, then decides to throw the pizza onto the street to feed the birds who we were having dumb conversations with. After the birds were gone, a Ute drove by and ran over the pizza, sending it 4 feet into the air and it made a beautiful sound. It was so hilarious at the time. 11/10

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Text - Alieneater • 14h One time in 9th or 10th grade I had a big bag full of nickels, dimes and quarters. I threw it all by the handful down the stairs over a horde of kids while everyone was running around between classes. Total mayhem ensued. You'd have thought those were hundred dollar bills the way people were scrambling.

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